This real-life Andrew Ryan is constructing a Rapture for hamsters
Is a hamster not entitled to the seeds in his cheeks? No, says the person in Washington, it belongs to the poor. To the person within the Vatican, it belongs to God. Novelist, YouTuber and undersea exploration fanatic Alex Beyman rejected these solutions.
Beyman selected one thing totally different. He selected Hampture.
We noticed Beyman’s undersea rodent utopia on Twitter earlier right this moment, the place he defiantly responded to a Vox article claiming they will “by no means take [his] aqua hams”. That is a hell of a line, accompanied by a photograph of two submerged enclosures dolled as much as appear to be Bioshock’s undersea metropolis—full with phasmid dispensers and applicable neon indicators.
Additional digging reveals that Beyman’s been engaged on placing collectively this elaborate enclosure for nearly a decade, posting common updates on YouTube and sometimes working dwell Twitch “Hamcams”. For now, the enclosure at present consists of two sealed rooms related by a pipe, however Beyman has grand plans for his libertarian hamster nightmare.
“Sooner or later I awoke with the inexplicable want to construct underwater hamster cities,” Beyman writes on his Patreon. “However underwater dwelling house is pricey, even when scaled down, so I’ve needed to begin small. With ample funding, the habitats will change into bigger and extra elaborate.”
Sticking pet hamsters right into a cramped, home made undersea enclosure does, in fact, increase questions of animal security. The pets won’t must content material with splicers or turrets, however critics have identified that the enclosures are too cramped for the animals, missing in the proper toys and parts to maintain the hamsters stimulated.
Beyman stresses that this is not the hamsters’ everlasting residence, usually dwelling in a extra conventional enclosure. Hampture itself reportedly has quite a few alarms and failsafes in case of leaks or depressurisation and is barely used for brief durations (although seems has been used for as much as a month in some instances).
Moreover rising the scope of Hampture, Beyman’s stretch targets recommend making a hamster submersible, a time capsule to “confuse future archaeologists” with the whole lore of Hampture, and eventual plans to create a small, Human-scale underwater enclosure for patrons to return go to.
Maybe mercifully, his precise Rapture is barely 11% in direction of actuality. Within the meantime, we’ll must make do with Hampture. Maybe he’ll add a foyer greeting new rodents with the portent: “No gods or kings, solely Hams.”